To All Expectant Dads

We’re expecting a new little Lacey in the fall, my first grandchild, and with Father’s Day approaching, I thought we all could use a reminder of how significant fathers are. This is a “letter” from that unborn child to her (?) father.

Happy Father’s Day, Daddy-o . . .

How do you like the onesie Granny got me? I think it’s perfect myself.

Sorry the photo shoot at the doctor’s office caught me at a bad time the other day. I was resting and it was just so comfy in there with my legs crossed. I hear you’re pretty sure I’m a girl, but there’s a chance I was hiding something. I wouldn’t know.

Anyway . . .there are some things Granny thinks you already know, but she wanted me to remind you anyway. Things like . . .

¤ Regardless of my gender, you’ll be the most important man in my life for quite a long time. Whatever you are, that’s what I’ll expect a man will be. Granny tells me you’ll be a wonderful example.

¤ If I am a girl, I’ll get my first indelible impressions of how I can expect to be treated as a woman from the way you treat my mom. Those memories will influence me all my life. Keep havin’ fun together.

¤ On the off-chance I’m a boy, I’ll get my first indelible impressions of how a man walks through the world from you and I’ll pattern myself after what I see you do. Granny tells me she sees a lot of your father in you and it’s all (well, “mostly,” she says) good. Pass it on!

¤ Regardless of who I am . . .

I I’ll sit on your lap and watch Charger games with you, but you’ll need to calm down. All that shouting and stomping and gnashing of teeth will be way too scary for me this year.

I I’ll play with you any time you want.

I I really will think you have super powers like the onesie says. I hear you used to say “Daddy will fix it” whenever you broke anything. Well, guess what!

¤ The time will come when I don’t think you have super powers at all and are actually rather timeworn and out of touch. Remember how ignorant Granny and Grandpa got when you were in high school? I hope that doesn’t happen to you, but it might. Don’t worry. They got smarter later on, and I think you will, too.